Unusual or Aggressive Behaviour
Sometimes people who have dementia behave in ways that those around them may find strange, or difficult to deal with. All behaviour has a reason, but sometimes it can be very difficult to understand what this might be, especially when someone you have known for a long time seems to be acting out of character.
You may find the Alzheimer's Society factsheet about unusual behaviourhelpful.
Aggressive behaviour, particularly from a loved one, can be especially difficult to deal with. Some carers and family members find it helpful to know that aggressive behaviour may be linked to the disease process. For instance, carers often report a period of several months, during the middle stages of Alzheimer's disease, when the person with dementia becomes verbally or physically aggressive towards them.
Aggression is often caused by frustration, and may occur when the person with dementia is trying to do something (e.g. leaving the house), and somebody tries to stop them. It is important to avoid confrontation if at all possible.
Alzheimer's Society factsheet Aggressive behaviour has further information.
Do not be afraid to ask for professional help, e.g. from the doctor, if you are frightened that the person you care for might hurt you.
It can sometimes be helpful to talk to a carer who has managed with someone whose behaviour is difficult. They could have some useful ideas for you to try and can give you support and encouragement too. Contact your local carer support group either:
Managing Memory 2gether offers telephone support, written information, referral to other services and advice on a wide range of topics.
Contact: 0800 694 8800 or Email: managingmemory@glos.nhs.uk
Carers Gloucestershire have a confidential telephone helpline staffed weekdays 9.30am to 4.30pm to help you with any query you might have to do with your caring role. Contact: 01452 386283.
Hallucinations and Delusions
Some people with dementia may experience visual or auditory hallucinations, seeing or hearing things that are not really there. Hallucinations are more common in certain types of dementia (e.g. dementia with Lewy bodies).
Delusions occur when the person with dementia develops distorted ideas about what is happening around them. These ideas may seem paranoid to those around them, but logical to the person themselves. For instance when a valuable item goes missing at home, and the person with dementia is sure they have not moved it, so looks for another explanation, e.g. it has been taken by burglars, who are out to get them. At this point even finding the item in question may not resolve the situation.
The Alzheimer's Society factsheet Hallucinations and delusions has further information, and tips for coping with these experiences.
Wandering
Some people with dementia may walk about restlessly, either within their home or going outside. Carers often describe this as 'wandering', but this term has become unfashionable among dementia professionals, who are keen to acknowledge that the person themselves may be walking purposefully, even if those around them do not understand what this purpose may be.
If you would like more information about walking and dementia, Alzheimer Scotland has an interesting information sheet you can download (PDF, 148KB) called When people with dementia walk.
Relationships Information
Sex is not always a subject that is easy to talk about;the Alzheimer's Society has a helpful factsheet about physical intimacies. The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy can provide contacts for local counsellors specialising in sexual relationship therapy.
The Alzheimer's Society website also has a more general Relationships information section.
